I know that it's just a closet.
Your things have been in there for 8 months untouched since you left us. So today I decided to get some boxes and to do what I've needed to do.
Honey, this is so hard. I started slow. I was pulling all of your shoes out, and matching them pair by pair. I did pretty good but I think there were maybe a dozen singlets left over. Have no idea where the other shoe could be.
Then I worked on the hanging clothes. There were some of those jackets from the early '80's in there .. you know the ones with the big puffed up shoulders ... kind they wear on those old tv shows you used to watch all the time.
Finally I just pulled a bunch of sweaters and things down and put them in boxes and got them all in the car to take to Goodwill or some other place. You should have seen Socks and Trixie helping .. they were just right in the middle of it all ... you would have smiled and laughed at them.
It all seems just so final in so many ways. I kept putting it off as if to keep a connection between us but you are gone and you are never going to use that stuff ever ever ever again. And realizing that, really realizing that is so incredibly hard.
There is much else left to work through, this was just one of the big pieces. I miss you so much my Susan.
